Well, I almost let the month go past without mentioning my 4-year Wedding Anniversary to my Husband! He promised me unconditional Love and I have to say, so far, he has kept his promise. I think he knows, as soon as I don't feel unconditional love, he could have a crazy wife on his hands. I'm still not quite sure how he knew that was the one thing he had to say to guarantee a, "Yes, I will marry you".
I believe I mentioned in previous post that this is my second marriage. My first marriage, I was young and he was 9 years older, so I grew up and we grew apart. I heard a saying recently that God put certain people together sometimes just to create certain people. I like that saying and I have accepted that as our purpose. Someone wanting to marry me the first time who accepted the fact that I could have a child with hemophilia, I have to admit I thought it would never happen. Therefore, when I decided to get divorced with two children and one with a bleeding disorder, I still was not confident that someone else would want to marry me.
For the first two months after my first husband and I decided to divorce, I didn't tell anyone. I was embarrassed and felt like a failure. One night I was playing cards with some friends from work, had a few drinks (liquid courage), and casually mentioned that I was getting a divorce. A month later, one of those friends at a New Years Eve party pulled me aside and said, "I know you are getting a divorce and you will be back on the market soon and I just want to let you know I'm interested in dating you". He threw a few more lines in there, but I will spare you the details. It did help his case that soft music and candle-lights were setting the mood. So, this New Years Eve will be our 10 year Anniversary of actually being together! I know, I know I'm easy!
I have to give my Husband credit. He came into the relationship not knowing anything about Hemophilia. When he told his Mom, he was dating a Women who had a son with hemophilia she said, "The Royal blood disease". Yes, his Mom was in her 70's so she knew the old school description, but at least she was familiar. My Husband though, even as a new boyfriend came in and helped me a great deal. We moved in together early, but he would wake up in the morning and hold Marques while the Nurse did his prophy treatments three times a week, while I went off to work. He also started talking to my Dad about growing up with hemophilia. My Dad loved telling his horror stories of bad bleeds. My Dad also invited him to listen in on a Hemophilia meeting with other Men who shared their stories.
I think the stories made him nervous for my son, whom he grew to love as his own. I still think as a Stepparent, your thoughts and feelings are a little different than it actually being your blood child with hemophilia...my husband would argue differently. Anyway, my Husband was content with raising my children as his own; so we never had plans of having a child together.
Well a few months after getting married, those plans change because 4 months later I found out I was pregnant with twins! We had one night of playing around saying let's make a baby and we made two! So of course, we go through all the concerns of having another child with hemophilia. My husband surprisingly still remained okay with the reality. He didn't even want to find out the sex of the babies, where I on the other hand needed to know so I could prepare myself to expect another child with hemophilia. However in the end, someone else did want to marry me. My Husband continues to love me and our 4 children unconditionally. I pray each Anniversary that never changes! Love ya babe XOXO